Hi! After a very disturbed nite....mainly spent trying to ignore my streaming cold and horrible itching I had noticed a lot of red and soreness around my plasters under my boobs. Its a difficult one but slightly shows in one of my previous photos... imagine 2 -3 times worse. So I had emailed my consultant and told him I was worried and no longer understood how things should be. I attached the photo. Within two hours I had a response urging me to call the nurse and have my plasters removed wound cleaned and new plasters put on. That's what happened and I feel like new! I cant put the photo of how it all looks now its a bit gruesome but I will put here my song been singing it all day.
God and I are on a journey at the moment....I had been a devout Christian for some time I believe with no doubt of any kind God exists and he is in charge however some of the theologies I have adopted over the years mainly through personal experience and then through some challenges have made me reconsider some things. I had also been rubbish at everything that I previously though meant to be a Christian so I am kind a at a strange place of "show me the way and lead me through it" right now. Interesting isn't it when you think you know something, someone then you realise just how wrong you might be having had formed an opinion, a way of life and a rigid framed picture of it all...well put it this way the FRAME has gone the picture is vivid. Meaning God is there I see him...I understand him however not sure the FRAME I had given his image is actually the one that suits and fits. So I am on a journey.....the last two years have been about understanding how wrong and how unbelievably rigid I had become.....so I have embraced my humanity and my frailness and now....I feel and I know just how vulnerable I am too...its ok....and its really liberating in a strange way,
So new boobs....you might say:) with a huge price....a new me!? Maybe with a huge price too.....but I am on the journey and I love it. No pain no gain?!I am in no real pain other than often I feel tortured by the fundamentalism and rather black and white ways of my previous self.....but I am grabbing my freedom...and starting to make something of that other self?! - while harmonising...a rare luxury to have so much time for me....
Here is one of my fav songs and fav singers....this song always says it so well.
LIfe is easy when you're up on the mountinhttp://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RCTl4tUYIAg&list=RDJhUvFqOY00I
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment